Everyone stop talking about pumps 5 Comments

Everyone stop talking about pumps

There are some words that I’ve never heard anyone use in conversation, but read all the time in fiction, especially in descriptions. One of these is an allegedly particular type of shoe: pumps. Frankly I never know what to imagine. Are they flat sneakers, are they wicked sick basketball shoes, formal shoes, heels? Wikipedia suggests it could be any of those. Well so what the hell, stop using them to describe particular things. ‘She was wearing pumps’ gives me minimal insight into what is on her feet, let alone her character, because it’s totally ambiguous to me.

While I’m here and whining, could non-fiction writers who can’t think of a title for their piece, please, please, stop using ‘What We Talk About When We Talk About X.’ It was cute maybe once, now it’s annoying. You’re no longer referencing Carver, you’re invoking dozens of other unimaginative/rushed title-writers.

  • http://www.toothsoup.com phill

    I have always imagined pumps as a cross between high heels and those basketball shoes you used to be able to pump up with the button on the tongue. No, don’t ask me how that even works.

    To add my own gripe, please replace ‘bangs’ with ‘fringe’. Bangs doesn’t fucking make sense. What is banging? The only thing I can see is my head against the wall about how stupid it sounds.

    Oh, and game/movie developers: creating a third title in your franchise is NOT an invitation to add a colon and ‘Reckoning’, ‘Redemption’, or ‘Resurrection’ after it. THERE ARE OTHER WORDS (and even letters–why are ‘r’ words so popular? Are producers all pirates?). Or just name it something completelydifferent? People aren’t stupid enough that they won’t recognise a series, books do it all the time? Geez.

    • http://www.expressmedia.org.au/voiceworks/ Johannes Jakob

      just wanted to say I ‘lolled’ at banging your head against the wall

    • http://www.lesstalkrecords.com/canoe Daniel Hogan

      I feel the same seething discontent for the bangs/fringe thing.

      Bangs belong to rabbis.

      Or is it spelled rabbi’s ?

  • http://jennasten.wordpress.com/ Jenna

    From what I understand, they are high heels, but chunkier. Why they need a different name to heels I’m not sure. Probably marketers using a new word to dress up an old product. Another win for advertising!

  • Alex

    I was pretty confused by pumps for a long time too. I now have a fairly distinct image of what I think they are (see link). My reasoning is a bit perverted. The main person I associate the word with is Maggie Alderson (fashion columnist and chick lit author) and these are the kind of shoes she wears. QED- not necessarily right.

    http://www.chicfaced.com/wp-content/uploads/ysl-trib-two-platform-pumps.jpg

    Phill- I’m sure lots of producers are, in fact, pirates. I wouldn’t put it past them.

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